Making Realizations
by KeepsAwayTheNargles
Summary: Remus wakes up and acknowledges the known fact that he's gay. It took him quite some time, but now that It's In the open with himself, he's itching to tell someone else. He just needs the perfect opportunity.


AN: Okay guys! This story came out unbeta'd and a little rushed, because the original story I meant to publish got deleted somehow. It's pretty late here so I came up with another story on the spot. Hopefully even though It doesn't relate too much to my Lil Sis story, it can still be counted. I feel pretty bad about not having anything good ...

The prompts I used are ... Just Before Dawn, An Unexpected Visitor, I wish, Believe, and Wolfstar

* * *

He noticed not in one moment, but in a string of moments that never really started or ended anywhere. Remus was gay. It had always been a real thing, but nothing to be acknowledged. He didn't want to acknowledge the fact, so he pushed it away and didn't deal with it.

It's the same situation when a band is together, and they've been rocky for weeks, and no one wants to mention that they are about to break up, but they do. It's when someone's being overly obvious about being a third wheel, but the couple continues to ignore the forgotten friend. A situation that has always been unwritten, but never said out loud to be set in stone.

Just before dawn, Remus happened to wake up and simply acknowledge that he's gay. Then he set out to figure out why it happened. He must find the catalyst.

Dressing and showering before entering the Great Hall, he finds his two friends.

"Hey."

"Remus, you're here finally. Sirius came up with a plan." James grabs his arm and practically shoves him down onto the bench. "To fool filch while we scope out the third floor for passages."

Rubbing his eyes sleepily, and yawning he smiles. "Okay. I'm not going to be there, so why are you telling me?"

"Because, if an emergency comes up, where we need a distraction ..." Sirius takes puppy dog eyes to a new level. Damn puppy.

"Nope. I cannot take a detention. My grades will slip." He cares about his education and actually enjoys learning, thank you very much.

"Which is why you won't get caught," James laughs. "All you have to do is thrown something at Peeves, and he'll do the rest for you."

Sirius turns to the both of them. "It's simple, and we won't need a lot of time. I only need to check behind a couple more statues."

"That corridor has wayy too many statues for comfort, a passage has to be hidden behind one of those ugly things."

Remus rolls his eyes but doesn't disagree. They are his friends, and he doesn't have anything else better to do. He's already studied for Professor Binn's quiz tomorrow. "Fine."

Later that night around nine at night, he creeps out of his bed fully aware that Filch could see him the moment he steps out of the Portrait. Instead, he glances both ways like he's crossing the street and tiptoes into a nearby classroom.

He isn't supposed to have Prefect duties tonight, but he made sure to look at the schedule. She'll be patrolling the entire second floor corridor for ickle firsties. In return, he'll be on the fourth floor waiting to distract Filch should his friends be idiots.

In the dim light coming from the window, Remus wonders about himself and his sudden change this morning. The fact that he's come to terms with something no one else knows, he's almost itching to tell someone about it. He believes that his friends will take the situation lightly, and still treat him the same. He believes, that it won't upset anyone who cares about him to be honest.

It's almost an hour later when he hears a thump coming from the floor beneath and hopes it isn't his idiotic friends. Stretching his legs and standing, the short boy takes his wand from his pocket and holds it at the ready. Remus waits for the signal.

The door creaks and into the room comes Sirius.

"Remus, James went into the passage half an hour ago. I don't know where he is now, or how long the passage is, but I was standing watch outside and Filch went in after him.

I scrunch my eyebrows together in a splenetic manner. "Let's go save the day." Always the sensible one.

On the third floor corridor, both Remus and Sirius look at each other. Remus looks at Sirius in a different light. Literally. In the darkness of the hall at ten past eleven, he can't but think of his friend as dashing. He's tall and broad shouldered, has black hair and tattoos. (Something he acquired when he was rebelling against his parents by using muggle born things, in this case, ink) Girls would think of him as handsome.

They enter the dark passageway behind the one eyed witch statue, and takes quiet steps. Filch is somewhere ahead of them, and hopefully farther then him, James. Remus hopes his friends aren't idiots, and have found a real passage, because plenty of them them have been dead end duds. In that case, James is done for because he'll have to double back.

"Remus, what are you thinking about? It's too quiet."

"Shhh, Filch might-"

"I haven't heard a whisper since we entered, I think he's too far ahead of us. What are you thinking?"

I sigh. "I was thinking about a secret. Something serious."

"What's that?"

"I'm ga-"

In that moment, Remus cut himself off. He heard a noise coming from ahead of them. A shuffling sound, coming fast towards them. Sirius stands still beside him. Both of their breathes mingle together.

"Should we go back?"

Remus stands firm. "No, it might be James."

Sirius admires his friend, who never wants to get caught or in trouble, but when caught in a situation where a friend needs his help, he's always trustworthy. Sirius admires Remus' trustworthy personality and that's why he always agrees to help him and James.

"Holy crap, run!"

It was James. As he passes he takes both Remus and Sirius' arms and pulls them forward with urgent speed. "Filch is right on my tail!"

"We know."

Up in the dormitory the trio laugh. If James hadn't pulled out his invisibility cloak they might have been goners. James is sitting in one bed grinning madly. While Sirius and Remus are on another bed with Sirius' arm around his smaller friend.

"I didn't know you were going to go into a panic attack! Which sucks, sorry ..." James says.

Remus still pants hard, his chest squeezing. His ribs feel entirely too small for him. Knots are still twisting in his stomach.

"I didn't know you were going to appear like a banshee ..."

They argued and played like this for just under half an hour, when Remus went to tell James about a joke he heard. "He's asleep. "

A moment of silence went by (James was the most talkative of the three) before Sirius speaks up again. He looks over to his friend lying next to him on the bed.

"Can you breathe now? Not going to have an asthma attack?" Remus was enjoying Sirius' cuddling, especially since he had embraced it this time, and not shied away from the closeness. "Do I need to get Madame Pomfrey? Because if I do ... I won't."

Remus shoves his shoulder hard. "Hey!" He laughs. "No I'm fine now."

"Remus, what was that serious thing you were going to tell me, before in the passage. You were thinking about something."

This time, lying in bed with Sirius, not under the guise of pitch black, he almost choked and told a lie. Remus didn't feel like hiding anymore, he had to admit that when you gave into cuddling, it felt like it could cure diseases.

"I wish I could tell you this, but I fear you'll reject me. Well, I'm ... gay."

It took a minute for Sirius' mind to catch up with him, and to notice he was lying in bed with him. Remus thinks he's going to get up and move to the other side of the room. Instead he leans on his elbows and looks him straight in the eyes.

"Me too."


End file.
